Monday, September 22, 2008

It's Time!



What interesting times we're living in! Never before have we had so much, and never before have we had so much to lose.


Today's financial news is stressful, to say the least. I know I'm not the only one who has been rethinking my priorities.


For example, I will never again spend a crazy amount of money on a house or a vehicle. I now know that both can lose half their value almost overnight.


Never again will I miss my son's football game for a chance to "catch up on some paperwork."


Never again will I judge my acquaintances by who they know or what they have.


Never again will I believe that I can't make a difference, because I am only one person. I am one person, and I am making a difference.


Never again will I believe that I don't have time to sit down at the dinner table with my family each night.


Never again will I believe my happiness is tied to what I have in my bank account.


And never again will I make my friends and loved ones feel as if they are somehow secondary in my life, behind work, and behind my own selfish interests.


I wish you all a wonderful week ahead, and I encourage you to explore what your own priorities truly are. Even though times are tough, it's never too late to turn hardships into something positive!

Sincerely,
Amanda Larson
Publisher Gentle Path Press
480-488-0150
alarson@gentlepath.com

Friday, August 29, 2008

No Recovery For You

The United States Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) has declared September to be National Alcohol and Drug Addiction Recovery Month. It's a fantastic event, and many, many people will benefit from the education and acceptance SAMHSA is promoting. In addition, this year's theme, “Join the Voices for Recovery: Saving Lives, Saving Dollars,” is raising awareness about the financial and human costs of substance abuse disorders. According to their website, SAMHSA is “highlighting the benefits that investing in treatment can have on those who enter recovery, their families, and the larger community.”
Drug and alcohol addictions are unquestionably terrible problems in American society today. Not only does substance abuse destroy lives, but taxpayers, insurance companies and families spend billions of dollars in direct and indirect costs each year.
So what about process addictions? We see the emotional and financial toll of gambling and financial disorders, eating disorders and sex addiction every day. Even if they are labeled “compulsions” instead of “addictions,” don't they fit under the “mental health services” portion of SAMHSA?
Apparently not.
And I wanted to know why.
I called SAMHSA's hotline telephone number and asked a very nice man why eating disorders, gambling and financial addiction and sex addiction weren't included anywhere on SAMHSA's website. “Are they topics you have researched, or that you address?” I asked.
“No, I don't think they are,” he responded.
“Why is that?” I asked.
Long pause.
“You know, let me get you the phone number for the Office of Applied Studies,” he responded.
I called the number he gave me, and another very nice person answered the phone. I asked her the same question.
“No, we don't do any of that,” she said. “I know we do things on drugs, alcohol and tobacco, but I can't think of anything we might have on those types of things.”
“Why is that?” I asked.
She laughed. I laughed.
“I can't answer that,” she said.
She laughed. I laughed.
“Really,” I said. “I was on the SAMHSA website, and I see that, for Recovery Month, the focus this year is on the high cost associated with drug and alcohol addiction in our country. I see the high cost associated with eating disorders, sex addiction and financial disorders every day. Do you have any research or programs associated with process addictions?”
She put me on hold to ask someone else. When she returned to the telephone, she said, “There's nothing ongoing. There's kind of like a line ... is it an addiction, or is it a compulsion?” she explained.
“OK,” I said. “But, let's say, for argument's sake, that it's a compulsion. Wouldn't that fall under the mental health part of Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration?”
She laughed. I laughed.
“Really,” I said.
“I don't know,” she said. “I can't answer that.”
She directed me to the June of 1999 Presidential study conducted by the National Gambling Impact Study Commission. It took two years to compile, and was given to the President, Congress, governors and tribal leaders. “You might want to check that out,” she told me.
It turns out that report was, indeed, very enlightening. It outlined the criteria for pathological gambling, said it was, indeed, a huge problem, recommended restrictions on the availability of gambling venues and on advertising, said nearly 11 million people are either “lifetime problem” or pathological gamblers, and 7.9 percent of the adult population in the US is “at risk.” They estimated that the annual direct costs of gambling in the US are $5 billion per year, and the estimated lifetime costs (which include things like bankruptcy, arrests, legal fees for divorce, etc.) to be $40 billion per year.
Which means that our federal government is aware of the impact of at least one process addiction. Which means that it's all the more absurd that they aren't addressed by SAMHSA.

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

What are You Reading?

I've been doing a lot of networking lately on LinkedIn and Facebook. What cool tools those are! I don't even have to have real friends anymore because I can spend large chunks of time meeting, greeting and interacting with virtual ones!

Being the strictly scientific, dry and quantitative person that I am, I submitted a question on LinkedIn regarding book buying habits. I wanted to know what makes people buy books, and I wanted to know where they're making those purchases. The results have been interesting.

It seems the majority of those who answered are buying their books online, which is no surprise, since they are obviously internet users (being on LinkedIn and all). But many, many people said that, although they are purchasing online, they really like to go into bookstores and browse. "Every now and then I'll go in to a local bookstore out of guilt and buy my books there," wrote one person.

What was really neat, though, was the wide scope of folks who are still reading actual books that they can actually hold. Whether they buy them from Amazon or from a corner store, there seems to be nothing that compares to reading something in print. Not the computer, not Kindle ... nothing. I thought that was cool. One guy said he buys and reads five a week ("See the list of my 4000 favorite books at scribd link below and the 12 books I have recently written ..." he wrote); another says he reads about 15 a week. So, see, I'm normal. (I had to stick that in there for my husband.)

One of my new virtual friends suggested that we overreaders start a support group. "BAA, book addicts anonymous," He said. "Nice little sheep character as the logo. Done."

There was also a really wide variety of genres represented. People who answered (and there are 70+ at this time) were reading everything from textbooks to self-help to Planet of the Apes (I'm not even making that up). There were lots of business-related books in their hands, and also an occasional classic.

It's so fantastic to see that people are still buying books. I truly hope our children and grandchildren will always know the thrill of the smell and feel of opening up a brand new book.

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Feeling Like a Kid Again

As my blog followers may have noticed, I was in a bit of a silly mood last week. Every now and then, though, it's fun to break out a little goofy. For those of you who missed it, I traded my very serious publisher glasses for a pair of 3-D glasses last Friday. I don't think I've had a better time at the office in years!

Aaah, but the fun didn't end there. This weekend, my husband and I packed up the boys, beach balls and water cooler and went to Sedona. Yes, that's right--Sedona. When you live in the desert, creek banks become beaches. We headed out to an absolutely gorgeous place called Crescent Moon Ranch where blackberries grow wild and Oak Creek runs cold. It was a nice and cool 95 degrees there, which was a comfortable respite from our 105 degree Phoenix temps.

For those who don't know me, that must not sound so unusual. But for those who do ... yes, I went to the creek. It's true. And no, there were no shoe stores, clothing outlets or wine bars there. Not even a Starbucks. For miles and miles.

With guidance of another similarly displaced gal I met in the parking lot, we headed down a dirt pathway (don't worry--I wore my cheap flip flops and didn't even bother to do my toenails first) about half a mile to a breathtakingly beautiful swimming spot. And there, it happened.

For years, I've been hording Ann Taylor and Coach items like, well, like a person who hordes things. I have nice nails, my shoes match and I sometimes hang out at home wearing those little tooth whitening strip things. (Don't look at last week's photo for reference ... that was a bad hair/outfit day.) I've become the girly girl my mom always wanted.

But I wasn't always that way. As one of the only girls in a large enclave of cousins, I was the biggest tomboy ever in the world until my teens, when I figured out that it was no longer cool to be able to beat boys at armwrestling. I played in the mud when it rained. I greased my own bike chain. I caught the biggest crawdads, and I didn't flinch when they pinched me.

So when my boys jumped in to the murky creek water, some long-forgotten instinct kicked in. I headed right in after them and beat them to the rope swing. We all scampered on to the far shore and hitched ourselves up on to a launching rock. I'd like to say that I forgot my fear, standing on that high, slick rock barefoot as I reached out over the water for the rope. But that wouldn't be true. That, and my kids might see that I lied and make fun of me again for shaking like a leaf and making them count down four times before I jumped. So I will tell the truth. It was scary! Did I mention that that rock was high and slick?

I flew through the air over the water and let out a primal yell before I let go of the rope. My body did some funky pose thing that resembled something I've seen roosters do, and I barely remembered to close my mouth before I hit the water's surface. Then, splash! It was over!

I turned and grinned at my beaming husband, then looked back at my boys. Their faces showed the horror that comes over adolescents when they realize their parent has made a complete fool of themselves in public. A whole slew of other 10- to 15-year-olds stood around them in line, also not smiling at all. But I didn't care.

For just a little while, I was taken back to childhood, when nothing mattered except getting home before the sun went down. I dug my toes deep into the muddy creek bed and splashed in the muddy water. It was wonderful.

I hope each of you finds time to break out of the mold this week and, if only for a moment, become that kid you once were.

Warmly,
Amanda

Friday, July 25, 2008

You Know You Want These ...

So last night, Carolyn and I took all of our kidlings to see Journey to the Center of the Earth in *3-D*. Emphasis on *3-D* because, well, seeing Encino Man in 3-D was just that much better.

The thing about it, though, was that it was hot. I mean, really. In the movie, the temperature keeps rising, and while Brendan and his cohorts were tromping around the center of the earth trying to escape the rising thermals, all I kept thinking was, "They should be sweating more." For much of the movie, Fraser's character was wearing a long-sleeved long underwear shirt, despite temps of around 105 degrees. Maybe I'm jaded because I've got Phoenix sensibilities, but I was thinking that maybe that might be warm enough to make him drip a little more perspiration. I'm just sayin'.

So anyway. I decided that I kind of liked my new 3-D glasses. And since they did cost an extra $2, and what with the economic depression we're all in right now, I thought I'd get some extra use out of them. I'm wearing them at the office today to see if they change my perspective. They're pretty cool, and everyone who's come in to ask me for stuff today has acted a little differently. It goes something like this:

OFFICE PERSON: [walks around the corner into my doorway] Do you have that information on ... [appears to have lost their train of thought]

[pause as OP ponders whether or not to ask] Um, that information on the budget issue we talked about.

ME: Yeah. Here you go. [hands OP a piece of paper from the (truly organized, I promise) pile on desk]

OP: Thanks. [still pondering] Have you launched that Recovery Start Kit promotion?

ME: [looking very serious] Yes, I have. What I've noticed is that there may be a lag in conversions due to the need for an education process. I'm finding that the clickover rate into the website has increased, although I don't see an overall net increase in sales in the minimal amount of time we've run the promotion. I would propose that it's because this is the first time many of these people are hearing about this product. The function of this campaign, then, is most likely to provide a catalyst to increase, over the next several months, the ratio of impressions to conversions. [blink ... blink]

OP: [stifling the urge to crack up] What did you say? [pause] Oh, nevermind. [Leaves the room]

So I am realizing that life is truly different in 3-D. People treat you differently, perhaps as if you have some contagious super power. I know now how it feels to be different, and all I can say is, "Don't be a hater."

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

Do It Anyway

It's a gorgeous day here in Arizona, and I was fortunate enough to be able to go to lunch with my friend Carolyn today. We sat out on the patio at Pei Wei and chatted and ate as fast as we could so that we could pack in the laughs before it was time to get back to work. At the end of lunch, we each grabbed a fortune cookie and broke them open to see how we're doing in life.


I was happy with mine ... "Your ideas are valuable and people will listen." Validation and Thai Dynamite Tofu. The day was going well! Then Carolyn opened hers. "You are unselfish with your advice and help," it read. We laughed, because it was so true! Carolyn is always good for an ear or a word of encouragement.



Suddenly, having valuable ideas didn't sound so appealing. It was like comparing Donald Trump and Mother Theresa. I'd rather be compared to Mother Theresa any day, although I don't look so great without makeup and I'm a sucker for Coach purses. Carolyn, on the other hand, never seems to run out of time or energy to do things for other people. She's naturally nurturing and effortlessly helpful.



On the way back to the office, I started thinking about what I could do to be a little more selfless. So starting today, I'm vowing to do three things: forgive someone, go out of my way to help a stranger, and compromise on something even when I believe I'm right. Even if I am right. (The last of which may be the toughest one.)



I hope that, even though I won't have the immediate reward of having my valuable ideas listened to, I can inspire someone else to pass it on.



Warmly,
Amanda



Amanda Larson
Publisher
Gentle Path Press, a division of
New Freedom Companies
http://www.gentlepath.com/


Wednesday, April 23, 2008

When Failure is Fine

Success is the ability to go from one failure to another with no loss of enthusiasm.
- Sir Winston Churchill

It is very easy to forgive others their mistakes; it takes more grit and gumption to forgive them for having witnessed your own.
- Jessamyn West, US Author

Today's headlines are full of failure. Politicians falter, stars are arrested, and bankruptcy and foreclosure rates are out of control. Everyone fails at something, sometime. But what we do with that failure is what makes all the difference. After all, if you don't fall down every now and then, you aren't trying hard enough.

I recently found myself failing to meet some work-related goals I'd set for myself, and my initial response was a strong urge to put on my favorite jammies, crawl into bed with a box of Kleenex and watch the Hallmark channel for the day. But somewhere between the closet and the TV, I realized that, although the specific goals I had in mind had not been attained, I had learned quite a bit in the process of trying to fulfil them.

I sat down and re-evaluated those goals, implementing what I'd learned to make them more realistic. I'm now on a new track toward meeting those goals. And my jammies stayed clean for more important things, like family game night ... there's nothing better than playing Scrabble with those you love while wearing polka dotted jammie pants.

Failure happens to all of us, and sometimes we need help to pull ourselves out of the mindset that allows us to quit altogether. By using guided imagery to set your goals and build a path to allow you to reach them, you can become who you truly want to be.

A great resource is Dr. Patrick Carnes' Spiritual Skill Set. The two-part audio set breaks new ground in helping people explore the basic spiritual dilemmas all of us face, whatever spiritual traditions and practices we use. The first CD reflects on the subject "Discernment," and the second on "Resilience." CDs are available separately for $19.95 each, or as a set for $29.95. You can find them at http://www.gentlepath.com/.

I would like to thank you for taking the time in your busy lives to read our blog and make it a part of your week. Know that you are a part of a supportive and caring community that shares in your challenges and in your failures.

Warmly,
Amanda Larson
Publisher Gentle Path Press
alarson@gentlepath.com
http://www.gentlepath.com/